Whenever it comes to relationships and marriage, the questions can be endless. From how soon is too soon to get married to how do you know when you are making the right decision?
Evan Marc Katz, a world-renowned dating and relationship coach, has some answers. He recently revealed eight questions you should ask yourself before tying the knot. Let’s take a look at what he had to say.
Do We Have a Good Relationship With Each Other’s Parents?
Now that you’re about to get married, it’s essential to ask yourself if you have a happy relationship with each other’s parents. Being in an amicable relationship with your in-laws can make you happily married. But it all comes down to being honest and open about the boundaries between family members.
When reflecting on your relationships, ask yourself, “Do I feel respected by my partner’s parents? Are they supportive of us? How do we handle differences in opinion? Have I established healthy boundaries between my in-laws and me?”
As per Evan Marc Katz, founder of Love U, having a good relationship with each other’s parents help you know how your partner will handle conflict within your marriage. Establishing boundaries and discussing these topics before marriage can help reduce tension or misunderstanding later.
Besides, an article from the New York Times mentioned that most in-laws’ relationships are workable. So, if you can have an amicable relationship, use it as an opportunity for growth. Take time to get acquainted with each other’s families and strengthen those bonds where possible.
Also, although cohesive relationships can be beneficial, couples should remember that their partnership comes first, even ahead of family dynamics.
Are We Going To Have Kids?
When couples are getting married, one of the most important questions to ask is, “Are we going to have kids?” While it may seem like a yes or no answer, understanding and discussing this topic can be complex.
Evan Marc Katz, a personal trainer helping smart women, stresses that the best predictor of a happy marriage is a man who helps with housework and parenting.
However, having children may not be feasible for all couples. Sometimes career demands, health concerns, or personal preferences can get in the way of having children. This decision should never be light as both partners must agree on whether having kids is right for them.
For instance, successful women, in particular, should consider how having children will impact their personal goals and ambitions. And at some point, both partners must be willing to give up some of their wants to make room for two children.
Do We Feel Safe With Each Other?
One of the most important questions we should ask ourselves is whether we feel safe with our partner. As a relationship and dating expert Evan Marc Katz puts it, “feeling safe” is one of the greatest predictors of a happy marriage.
Feeling safe in your relationship means feeling your partner’s unconditional love, security, and acceptance. It also means having the freedom to be yourself without fear or judgment. However, this feeling of safety isn’t always easy to find.
To find this, we have to—
- Look beyond our emotional boundaries to create a space for trust and open communication with our partners.
- Ensure that we are both comfortable expressing our emotions, needs, and desires without fear of anger or disappointment from either person.
- Take responsibility for our actions and mistakes to ensure no one feels unsafe or unprotected in the relationship.
Ultimately, feeling safe with one another is essential for creating a strong and lasting marriage. Being able to express ourselves freely and openly creates an environment where we can build trust and helps women understand men.
Likewise, it helps us become closer as a couple while allowing us both to lead single-day lives without worrying about judgment or criticism.
With these things in mind, it’s clear that when it comes time to marry someone, asking, “do we feel safe with each other?” is important before committing.
How Do We Handle Conflict Resolution?
Before getting married, couples should ask how they handle conflict resolution. The best way to handle this is to understand each other’s tendencies in the face of disagreements and arguments.
Questions like, “am I the type of person who can forgive easily after an argument, or do I hold grudges?” or “can I address issues head-on with direct communication, or do I tend to be passive-aggressive?” can help you determine your responses.
Once you understand your and your partner’s typical behaviors during the conflict, you will be better equipped to create a strategy for resolving disputes. Also, couples should consider which techniques work best to calm tensions when things get heated.
For example, some couples may find it beneficial to take a break from discussing the issue until emotions have cooled off. Then, others may prefer more confrontational approaches. But with so many options available, couples should discuss what works best for them before they tie the knot.
Finding ways to resolve conflicts effectively is essential for any marriage that hopes to last. Understanding each other’s reactions and preferences regarding arguments can ensure that fights don’t become destructive in the long run.
You may listen to dating coach Evan Marc Katz’s Love U podcast if you need more love advice. Likewise, his featured book “Believe in Love” in hundreds of media outlets is available.